Honesty Pays. And How!

See for yourself

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Happy Holidays People :-)

:-) I know! I know! I am in an exuberant mood today and these days have become a rarity in my life. No, don't ask. Zip. So you're all set to go out there and have a ball eh? You lucky bastard?

Brigade road sports a blazing, festive look. There are bands playing in pubs. There is a definite energy in the air and pretty girls giggle and walk by you. I never quite understood why they giggle so much. Either they have a bottomless supply of jokes, or they do this to irritate boys. I don't care. To me, that giggle is music. You go girl. Giggle away and make my day.

Anyway, you get out there, drink, listen to some good old rock, and have lots of fun. Merry X-mas and a happy new year. And, drink one for me. All you bloggers out there in Bangalore, shut the hell up, get out, and party. Man!

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The Cute Stewardess

As the ATR plane rattled and rumbled on the runway before take-off, the cute stewardess said,
'sir I hope you are aware that you have to operate the emergency exit door, in case of an emergency?'
I inspected the door I was sitting by and the illustrations and instructions on it and said 'Er. Yes?'
She flashed a well-practiced, fake smile and cooed again,
'Sir I hope you are aware that you need to open that door only in an emergency?'

'Oh! I was all set to open it! Oh shit! I am so disappointed. You ruined my weekend entertainment.'

She fluttered her eyelashes in an expression of utter dismay and said,
'Sir! But that's a crime! Opening that door when there is no emergency!'

And I cried.

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The Man That Shashi Kapoor Resembles

The other day Anita and I decided to meet up at Koshy's. The place was cacophonous, what with all the creative-types chattering away... firing empty words and thoughts into the cosmos. The waiter in his 43 year old uniform (that was never washed I am sure) took our order for drinks and we started talking. The drinks arrived in 44 year old glasses and we pounced on our drinks anyway.
Half way through our drinks I noticed this short, stocky old man staggering his way towards us. His wrinkled face told many a story and the slur of his speech told me that he was way past his alcohol limit.

"Have you-u s-seen Anand?" he asked me.
I was stumped. I didn't know if he was searching for a friend or if he was talking about the movie but thankfully he continued,
"Rajesh Kanna is going to d-die? Are you with me?"
And he took off on the movie: about how Rajesh Khanna meets strangers yada-yada. And suddenly he did a U-turn and asked, "Do you know Rajdeep Sardesai? That boy has started a new channel called CNN-IBN? Are you with me?"
I nodded not knowing what I should say.
"Yeah, he was interviewing this recluse director..."
I lost him.
And he suddenly said "I look like Shashi Kapoor?"
I thought we were still with Rajdeep and said,
"You mean the recluse director?" That pissed him off I think.
He said, "No, me! You don't think I look like Shashi Kapoor? I am the General Manager of the Taj hotels... you know Westend?"
I didn't know what hit me; the alcohol or the man and said,
"Of course you look like Shashi Kapoor!"
To which he said, "No he looks like me!"
And I said, "yeah, same difference."
He rummaged through the Journalist bag and produced a G.K. Vale cover. He pulled a photograph out. It was him, wearing a Monkey cap and a plastic smile that paled in comparison with the wrinkles on his face. He gave it to me and said, "It is for you. I have forty more. Don't worry, go on take it."
And he left us. He did not even acknowledge Anita's existence. He simply walked to the rest room. I have a soft copy of the picture but I am not posting it because I think it would violate his privacy. I mean what if a swarm of girls descend upon him when he is sipping his drink in Koshy's? No, I don't want to do that to him. I am sure he has been there, done that. ;-)
Well, it takes all kinds to make this planet spin I guess. I hope he finds warmth in the winter of his life. Oh well.

P.S. Read the Koshy's link in this post. Those bastards I tell you, ha ha.

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